Why did the can crusher quit his job?
A: Because it was soda pressing.
A lot of people cry when they cut an onion. The trick is not to form an emotional bond.
Every ten years, the monks in the monastery are allowed to break their vow of silence to speak two words. Ten years go by and it’s one monk’s first chance. He thinks for a second before saying, “Food bad.” Ten years later, he says, “Bed hard.” It’s the big day, a decade later. He gives the head monk a long stare and says, “I quit.” “I’m not surprised,” the head monk says. “You’ve been complaining ever since you got here.”
Two old friends crossed paths after not seeing one another for almost a decade.
Utkarsh: "What are you doing these days?"
Utkarsh: "Wow! You're a doctor!"
Sparsh: "No, Pizza Home Delivery."
Q: Why can't you tell an egg a joke?
A: Because it will crack up.
A disciple went to his master and said, "I have served you faithfully for ten years. Now I have a wish: give me something to eat which will never end." His master said, "Here, have some chewing gum."